...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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