so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
