Say something about gay babies.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
