he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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