I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Randomize
