Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
You made out with two different species that night
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Randomize
