I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
