D3 body, D1 cock
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize