whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I need help removing her.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
