school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
