but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
