We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
that's an acceptable place to lick
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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