I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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