You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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