I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
