his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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