did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
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im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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