Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
