she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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