Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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