i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
