Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty

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(256): View more from Alabama

It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.

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(410): View more from Maryland

I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.

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(785): View more from Kansas

I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.

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(360): View more from Washington

Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.

(360): View more from Washington

Welcome to Bellingham.

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(513): View more from Ohio

Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby

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(319): View more from Iowa

Drunk twilight is the only twilight

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