Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
i love accidental penises.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
