It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
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