dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
