What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I just cut my nipple shaving
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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