Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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