Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Mom said you looked used
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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