Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
she woke up with a sticky ear
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Randomize
