have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon