we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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