Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize