idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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