yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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