Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I still have a little drunk in my system
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Randomize