Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
