ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
