About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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