do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
