Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
