I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
you traded sex for a burrito?
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize