Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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