Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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