so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
