ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Randomize
