it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
