Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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