Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
As shirtless as possible
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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