I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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