One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Randomize
