if you like me you must not know who I am
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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